Pussy Needle and the Motorcycle Emptiness

sit on the back of Suzuki 420 Collision …doing 80 KPH..during sukimvet rush hour traffic.with a yaba smoking 15 year old driver ,who will be reincarnated manana..talking on a burner ..while looking for your stupid expensive hotel..while you contemplate the nature of sex blogging ..hit a pink taxi..turn into pink mist …yippi ki yay
welcome to bangkok cowboy..
lets talk about sex…shall we?
mr justin,mr carison and mr joe…were intrigued..and a little frightened by the menu and yet…..
“god damn it mr ellen..we have a table we need to order something” said mr joe
clearly..we were not going to get those wicked awesome shrimp cakes in plastic bag with chili cilantro and fish sauce it says right there…in bold type pussy menu
pussy ping pong,pussy razor,pussy banana,firecracker pussy,pussy calligraphy,man pussy,pussy singing,pussy trumpets playing a Whitney Houston memorial medley…and dude…i do not want to fucking know the what, why or how of ..pussy needle i recall reading about this in a brad rosen short story…the elephant pussy needle..and that was hard to shake..
“what’ll it be mr justin?”
‘a cigarette mr jerry and a photo pass”
‘ can we all agree ,mr carison needs to quit shrieking and climb out from under the table?.bad things have happened there and i don’t think they’re using sanitary wipes”
‘management has requested that mr joe cut it with the jackal laugh..its scaring the girls…they are currently pulling a rope of razors out of their ‘work station”..and startling them is not fucking cool’
‘i think mr becca needs to throw more water on mr sherm…he’s mumbling about cupid and love pong balls…and…oh..nasty …did that banana just land in your drink?
“500 baht for a glass of ice??…no i dont want to tip the banana girl 1000 baht!!!!?
” carison…do not come out from under the table…no matter what”
“yea joe…shes cute..and sure shes “different”from the rest…if for no other reason than shes hung like a fucking horse”
“somebody needs to get mr ellen out of the “bathroom”..its….just …not safe ”
” dude…wasn’t that chick a “friend of juniors” back in 99?..wait…is that junior?”
and lastly….”mr justin…you need to wipe the banana off your face…and no…shes not going to play “porch song” no matter how many of the green ones you throw her way”.
ok….want to swear off sex for a liftime?..go to patpong…and see the upstairs show…
i am an entertainer…i get it…learn a skill…do it front of people for money and hand claps..wipe off the razor blades..crawl home..dont look in the mirror…and back to work the next night
if you ever wanted fodder for a convincing argument against prostitution[tho it was unclear these women were indeed available for take out...these poor girls are the up country..heavy set .un-models...and they are fucking miserable] hang out on patpong at 2 in the morning and watch these girls and boys and inbetweens go home…they are exhausted..they are poor.they look degraded..and tho i know about getting old in a young persons profession…at least i dont have 15 drunk old fat australians yelling at me to put 5 sparklers in my ass while doing a choreographed dance to ‘paradise city” [alabama doesn't count}.
your asking ..."why the fuck would you go to such a place?..becuase its there..because its bangkok..because when your in cambodia you see angkor wat..and when your in bangkok for the first time you see this..and hopefully for you..you never see it again.
we could talk int the wee hours about the pros and cons of the sex trade here...i am talking about the over 18 legal sex trade..and it is indeed legal...there are 2.8 million sex workers in thailand..they are recognized by the buddah..who also recognizes men..women and those who fall under "both" some of these girls go home to thier village and buy a house and a car and a water buffalo and are the most eligable women in town...some of them them are sold by thier parents..i suppose you could ask them ...in the end...its money..there is a sub class of women here who work " weekends.putting themselves thru school..saving for a car.or a dowry ...its acceptable..and regardless of what we may think..its done and often with pride
remember when we were all running around getting nike and Jcrew to shut down their sweatshops..well we did it...add 200,000 women to the sex industry...nice job "concerned liberal american"[i include myself here]…
a fun detective series to read .. Bangkok 8…actually delivers a pretty good insight in to this issue..everyone here has read it…and i am not the writer to astutely comment..nor am i [unbelievably] a patron..the Lord and thousands of other people know i have alot of bad habits…but hookers was never my thing…i tell myself ,thats why i got in a band..so wouldnt have to sit with the aussie 50 plus punters or mr carl and pretend the girls “like me” i am insanely lucky..a smart beautiful wife..adorable children..and ..if it hasn’t been mentioned before..i actually wrote “boom boom boom’
still…there are plenty of lonely people out there who need someone to be nice to them,talk to them..and ultimately fuck them..and if your politically correct ass doesnt understand that…then you have a narrow view of humanity…its whats for dinner in most countries…americans just leave the illicit fucking to republicans and football coaches..and then support a 5 billion dollar a year porn industry that..trust me…is alot more insidious and horrific than this.
plus…its a whitney Houston memorial medley for christs sake[christ being another historical figure not unfamiliar with the pussy menu.]
so…as i cant really comment on the red shirt vs yellow shirts battles..or the army rounding up 3000 yaba dealers and quietly executing them..or the floods…this is one of the main talking points….tho i do think its a bit extreme that mr carison signed up for ‘classes”
its about over here…mr justin left first,covered in sticky fruit something or other..his camera having been confiscated by the trumpet girl…carison needed to get to “aspen” and will return for “classes” shortly…we played at a awesome place last night..a “Bandido” [yea..those bandidos] club house..with the most awesome proprietor Pok…motorcycle emptiness…we were lucky as mr ali..carries a french and algerian passport..so…when the iranians start throwing grenades[actually not one person believes this..the guy was wearing a mossad shirt for fucks sake]..and your name is ali…from algeria..going to meet mr frank and mr jerry…see my facebook photo..there are issues..theres going to be questions and cattle prods…hes ok..tho he and mr sherm seem to hug and cry alot…mr joe is still as far as i know pulling razor blades out of his ass..and mr ellen and mr becca are shopping for lidocaine suppositories …stay tuned on that one…
chop chop plays our last asia show at the WTF club mr skinner holding the camera…it may be awhile before anyone sees mr sherm….hes been asked to come down for questioning again..i should have mentioned that the shirt he borrowed from me says “hezzabollah…representing since 1986″..that combined with his recent order of “dancing bears and snake in sauce” at yet another “menu palace…suffice to say ..it could take awhile..hes asking for someone to ship him his “stabilizer meds” fedfuckingex….ok…show time…i think i;m going with the taxi..
goodnight noises everywhere…… mr jerry bangkok